/// ABOUT

One person.
One thesis.
One domain.

fuckbigtech.ai is run by Humza Ahmad through Kinetic Labs Inc. — an Ontario-registered corporation. Not a media company pretending to be a consultancy. Not a consultancy pretending to be a media company. Both, on purpose, under one roof.

/// WHAT THIS IS

A local AI advisory for mid-market regulated companies — 100 to 500 people, legal, healthcare, finance, government contracting. We run free sovereignty audits that show exactly which tools leak your data and where it ends up. If the report makes you want to move, we match you with a deployment partner.

/// WHAT WE DON'T DO

We don't deploy the hardware. We don't sell software. We don't resell cloud. We're not another SaaS layer between you and the thing you actually want — we're the audit, the plan, and the warm introduction to the operator who builds it.

/// WHY THE DOMAIN

Because the category has been sold to death by calm voices and it hasn't worked. Every prompt your team sends to OpenAI is still training your competition. Calm didn't stop that. If the name loses us buyers who care more about optics than exfiltration, that's the filter working correctly.

/// HOW WE MAKE MONEY

Referral commissions from deployment partners — 15-20%, paid by the partner, not by you. The audit is free forever. We get paid when you and a partner close. That means we're incentivized to hand you to partners who actually deliver, not whichever one paid us most.

HOW THIS ACTUALLY WORKS

Four steps. No call required until you want one.

01

Run the audit

Two minutes. A handful of questions about which AI tools your team is using today. Free, forever.

02

Get the report

Instant. Shows exactly which tools leak what data, where it ends up, and what a local-stack replacement looks like. Straight to your inbox.

03

Partner match

If you want to move, we hand you to a vetted deployment partner — matched to your region, vertical, and team size. One intro, no cold calls.

04

They deploy, we verify

Partner handles procurement, install, and onboarding. Typical engagement runs $15–75K depending on scope. You pay them — we cost you nothing.

The incentive is aligned.

We only make money when you and a partner close a deal — a 15-20% referral fee, paid by the partner, not by you. That means we're incentivized to hand you to partners who actually deliver, not whichever one paid us most. Misaligned incentives are the whole reason Big Tech won the last decade. We're not repeating that.

THE PARTNER NETWORK

We don't deploy. Vetted operators do.

We maintain a network of local-AI deployment specialists across North America, Europe, and APAC — filtered by region, vertical, and team size. When you're ready to move, we match you with the one who fits. No cross-regional routing. No vertical mismatches. No shotgun sales motions.

North America
US + Canada, legal / healthcare / finance specialists
Europe
UK, DE, FR, NL, CH — GDPR-native operators
APAC
AU, SG, IN — regional data residency covered
Middle East
UAE sovereignty mandate specialists
Partner network actively onboarding. If you're a deployment shop that fits the profile, [email protected].

/// START HERE

The audit is the door.

Two minutes. Instant report. No call required.

Run the AI audit →